Storytime

Apparently, my brother Michael walked into a telephone pole the other day. The story should end there with a good laugh.

Except then the 30 foot telephone pole fell over into the street.

My brother knocked over a telephone pole by walking into it?

So I'm wondering if:

a. Michael is secretly a super-hero.
b. Our phone companies need to dig deeper holes.

now watch me make a seamless segue-way:

Large pieces of wood falling to the ground reminds me: One (blustery) day back in ye old college years, I was on my way to class (running late, naturally) when a creaking, squeaking noise from up above caught my attention. I looked and saw--about 5 feet ahead of me and 12 feet above me--a big-ass limb dangling from its trunk. The piece of fiber connecting the two was no wider than a toothpick.

The wind had picked up speed, and the dangling limb swung to and fro, directly above my path. I should have been scared. I should have been cautious. Instead, though, I thought:

"oh please. limbs don't fall on people"

...and proceeded forward.

Next thing I knew, I was splayed face-down on the ground, with a big-ass branch on top of me. Pineneedles were everywhere, and a big-ass bruise was already burgeoning forth on my left thigh. (THANK GOD IT DIDN'T HIT ME IN THE HEAD. I'd've been DUNZO for sure.)

Moral: Things fall, so don't be dumb.