Prescription, or pervert?

I have very concerning news.  I write this post out of concern for my fellow bloggers, as they might not yet know the corrupt nature of our resident "doctor".  I write this post in an attempt to use the intra-net for good, unlike those (the doctor) who use it for their own selfish fetishes.  I have been suspicious for days, even weeks now, but I didn't feel it was my place to reveal the true merit (or lack thereof) of this PhD we call our Doc. 

I first grew suspicious when I read a very disturbing blog the Doc had written about some missing candy articles, namely a reeces peanut-butter cup.  I thought it odd that somebody we turn to for medical advice was filling the empty white space of our blog page with his woes about a missing piece of chocolate.  I found it even more upsetting that he placed immediate blame upon his own kin when it was blatantly obvious from the beginning his rodent kitten CoCo (I know it's spelled with two "k's"but I don't agree and it's my post) had the sweet tooth. 

Then, as if my suspicion about the scruples of this so called professional hadn't reached their utmost potential, I called my mother.  And she proceeded to tell me that Michael Stolte, d.d.s, had contacted her via email.  He had attempted to use cyberspace to woo and emotionally capture my dear, dear Momma Suze.  When I confronted him about their interaction, he proceeded to describe their conversation in detail, informing me that the bulk of their discourse involved him asking her to define the "birds and bees".  

The scariest part of this story is that I think she may be falling for it...for him.  She hates that cat, she has insulted it many times, and yet she continues to send emails across hundreds of electronic miles to reach the doctor.  I am afraid he is prescribing my mom unusual remedies, in the form of whispers and soft nudges.  Please, please....be advised.  

Concerned daughter and grossed out patient, 

Yeldah